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Man walks into a bar jokes
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Post by
mindthegap5
All you have to do is post the worst "A man walked into a bar..." joke you know
(eay peasy)
A man walk into a bar..........
OUCH
Post by
boods
A drunk walks out of a bar and sees a nun standing at a bus stop. He walks up to her and punches her in the face. When she falls to the ground, he starts screaming, "You're not so tough now, are you, Batman?"
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel hanging from his belt. The bartender asks, "What's that for?" The pirate responds, "Aarrr, its driving me nuts".
Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.
A guy walks into a bar. He says to the bartender, "Can I have a bag of helicopter flavor chips?" The barkeep says, "Sorry, we only have plain."
A horse walks into a bar, across the room, up the back wall, across the ceiling, down the front wall and then up to the bar. The bartender gives the horse a beer, he drinks it and leaves. A guy sitting at the bar looks perplexed and asks the bartender "Hey, what's that all about?" The bartender replies, "Don't take it personally, he never says 'Hi' to anyone."
A man goes into a bar with a giraffe, they both get a couple of rounds in. When they get up to leave they're extremely drunk and the giraffe passes out and falls over. The man opens the door, about to leave by himself, when the bartender stops him suddenly and says, "Hey! You can't leave that lyin' there!" The man turns around and slurs, "Don't be silly, that's not a lion, that's a giraffe!"
A pig goes into a bar and orders ten drinks. He finishes them up and the bartender says, "Don't you need to know where the bathroom is?" The pig says, "No, I go wee wee all the way home."
A drunk staggers out of a bar and runs right into two priests. He says, "I'm Jesus Christ." The first priest says, "No, son, you're not." So the drunk says it to the second priest. The second priest says, "No, son, you're not." The drunk says, "Look, I can prove it." He walks back into the bar with the two priests. The bartender takes one look at the drunk and exclaims, "Jesus Christ, you're here again?"
A dyslexic guy walks into a bra.
All credit to
http://www.funny2.com/bar.htm
Post by
Arathanar
So a seal walks into a club.
Post by
Random0008
A guys walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Is this some sort of joke"?
A guy walks into a bar with a duck. The duck asks the bartender
Got any grapes?
"No"
Got any grapes?
"NO!"
Got any grapes?
FOR THE LAST DAMN TIME NO AND IF YOU ASK ME ONE MORE TIME IM GOING TO NAIL YOUR DUCK BEAK TO THE WALL
Duck thinks for a moment and says...
Got any nails?
"No"
Good, got any grapes?
Post by
Interest
A dyslexic guy walks into a bra.
I love this one.
Post by
164232
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Dhazy
A pirate walks into a bar with a roll of paper towels on his hat.
A guy asks the pirate, "What's with the paper towels?"
The pirate replies, "Arrrr. I've got a Bounty on me head."
Post by
211590
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Post by
327953
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Post by
273605
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Post by
211590
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Post by
278900
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Post by
ShadowM
man walks into a bar, and points at a lady and says, "u are mine tonight baby.."
the lady says, "whatever jerk"
the man zips down zippers and says, "you know u want it baby."
the lady says, "hell yea i do ..."
the man says, "too bad, u aint getting any"..
the entire crowd laughs at the lady and cheers for the man....
No.
Post by
149424
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Post by
57943
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Random0008
man walks into a bar, and points at a lady and says, "u are mine tonight baby.."
the lady says, "whatever jerk"
the man zips down zippers and says, "you know u want it baby."
the lady says, "hell yea i do ..."
the man says, "too bad, u aint getting any"..
the entire crowd laughs at the lady and cheers for the man....
FAIL
QFT!
Post by
307945
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Dralas
So three irish men walk into a bar...
Post by
L33tsauce
A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bar tender here?"
Chuck Norris walks into a bar. There were no survivors.
Post by
211132
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